Note: This article contains discussion of child loss and drug dependency.
Hollyoaks spoilers follow from Monday's episode on Channel 4 streaming, which doesn't air on E4 until Tuesday.
Hollyoaks has aired a devastating relapse for Joel Dexter following the emotional funeral for their son Noah.
Joel and his wife Leela have been going through a traumatic time recently, with Leela tragically losing Noah during the 27th week of her pregnancy.
The couple's relationship came under particular strain during Noah's funeral on Friday (July 26), despite their attempts to support each other through the service.
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Tonight's (July 29) episode saw Leela discover Joel's journal, which he had used to convey some of his feelings of hurt, anger and guilt regarding the situation.
"All the anger, the pain. I know he's suffering, but I didn't realise it had got this dark," she said to Peri, with her daughter replying: "It's probably just his way of getting it all out."
"I just wish Joel would open up to me," an emotional Leela added.
While visiting Noah's grave, Joel tearfully spoke to his son: "I know you never got the chance to meet the world, Noah.
"But you still touched so many lives, generated so much love. [A funeral is] supposed to give you closure. At least that's what I used to say to my parishioners all the time. What a load of rubbish, yeah?
"You're putting to rest a person, a child, who should never have left you in the first place. How's a funeral supposed to help?"
The grieving dad went on to explain how "hard" he's finding things, and that he doesn't know "how much more he can take".
Back at home, Leela asked Joel if he wanted to join her and Daniel on a family picnic to try to "normalise" things, which he agreed to.
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After Leela and Daniel headed to the park early, Joel made an ominous phone call asking to meet up with someone.
Later, as Leela and Peri made dinner, Leela reflected on Joel not turning up to the picnic, thinking he was spending time with Abe.
"It's just really not been easy for both of us, but I'm glad he's talking it through with his brother," she said.
Instead, Joel is seen passing out in an alleyway after taking drugs. Will he be able to get the help he needs?
Hollyoaks streams first online via Channel 4 each weekday at 7.30pm. Episodes then air on E4 the following day, before getting their YouTube premiere a week after that.
Selected omnibus episodes are available via Prime Video.
Read more Hollyoaks spoilers on our dedicated homepage
Organisations including Sands and Tommy's are able to offer help and support to anyone affected by baby loss.
For more on drug addiction and dependency, including information and support, please visit FRANK or Action on Addiction.
