WARNING: This article contains adult content and is not for younger readers or the workplace.
After knowing for weeks that it was going to happen, tonight's (March 8) episode of Celebs Go Dating FINALLY saw Stephen Bear get kicked off the show for secretly dating Charlotte Crosby.
... But we've already talked about that one today, so here's what else happened.
Jonathan Cheban took Ffion (aka Miss Wales) to Paris, Joey Essex had his first second date (and has a third on the way) and Ferne McCann, well..
Following on from yesterday's mixer, Ferne went on her date with Ellis: a singer/songwriter/mixed martial artist type who has 20 million views on YouTube reviewing penis enlargers!
"I wanna get to know the guy behind the pumping," Ferne told the camera as she tried to convince us (and herself) she wasn't going to watch the videos before meeting up with him.
What to Read Next
When she gets to the date, Ferne begins the conversation by talking about the elephant in the room, but they clear the air and move on.
Obviously it's not long before the topic comes back up, with Ferne asking if his willy was tattooed as well.
Unfortunately, the conversation well ran dry. Have you ever have worst date small talk than "what's your favourite condiment?" We didn't think so...
After that, there's only one way things could go: He actually shows her the video!
Ferne had clearly felt like she had seen enough (ahem) and decided there wouldn't be a second date.
Obviously E4 blurred the video out for broadcast, but that just made viewers want to see it more, including Queen of Big Brother Nikki Grahame.
And look, we know by this point you just want to actually watch the video (don't even lie) but we can't actually embed it in the article because, if you hadn't noticed, it is VERY unsuitable for work.
But since it's our job to tell you what you want to know, the videos are right here. Just click on it at your own peril.
Meanwhile, here's Ellis auditioning for The X Factor back in 2015:
Celebs Go Dating continues tomorrow night (March 9) at 10pm on E4.
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Joe Anderton is a freelance news writer at Digital Spy, having worked there since 2016. In his time, he's covered a host of live events and interviewed celebrities big and small. A big fan of TV and movies both mainstream and obscure, Joe also enjoys video games and in particular PlayStation. Joe currently does not use Twitter, but he only ever used it to tell people to watch the film Help! I'm a Fish.
