Countdown's rudest moments – arse, phallus and itchy semis
Ban this filth.
Rachel Riley has had to put up with a lot over the years (as did Carol Vorderman before her). If it isn't a smirking "two from the top, one from the bottom", it's the rudery that comes when a random selection of vowels and consonants is presented to ruthlessly competitive contestants. If it's a choice between "sited" and "shithead", we know we'd take a risk on the eight-letter word. Mind you, it's Susie Dent we feel sorry for, as she's got to explain all the meanings…
ARSE
SNIGGER. Arse is a great word, because it's both innately British and also sort of charmingly rude – just think of Father Jack. So when Rachel Riley popped it up on the board, we couldn't help but have a giggle.
ERECTION
A SQUIRTER
Amazingly this one came up twice in 2017 alone.
CLITEASD
This entry into Countdown's profanity books should really be higher. 'Clit' is obviously very saucy. 'Clit tease' is even ruder. The only problem is that it doesn't quite get there. Still, a solid effort from the letters.
ITCHY SEMI
Where do we even start with this one? Semi would have been giggleworthy, but to make it an "itchy" one adds a whole extra layer of ewww/hilarity. What's best about this one, though, is that it was actually the Countdown conundrum – not a blooper, or a rude contestant, or a surprise with the letters. They wanted this on screen! Countdown is as cheeky as we are. (The answer, FYI, is "mythicise".)
ASSWIPE
Please don't show your working.
ORGASMED
We bet this led to a discussion on the relative value of turning nouns into verbs.
Editor, Digital Spy Chris has over 25 years' experience as a writer and editor, having worked as a journalist covering TV and movies since the '90s. Starting out as a TV listings editor at the Press Association, he was quickly hired by the nascent Heat magazine, where he rose to become Senior Editor, interviewing the likes of Simon Cowell, Boris Johnson and Paris Hilton. Over the years he has written about entertainment with clarity and wit for Heat, Elle, Q, The Telegraph and of course Digital Spy, and has served many times as a judge in the Royal Television Society awards. He has written and recorded a novelty single with Lord Lloyd-Webber, written scripts for the National TV Awards, made Noel Edmonds cry, accidentally punched an Inbetweener and stolen a small piece of rubble from the Battle of Hogwarts movie set. (They can't have it back.) LinkedIn
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