Hollyoaks actress Stephanie Davis has opened up about her mental health struggles in an emotional post on Instagram.
The actress, who is set to return to the soap after a three year absence, shared two pictures of herself when she was in a "dark place" side-by-side with two of her now.
Explaining how she felt in the first two pics, Stephanie wrote: "I was Dead inside. I never thought I would get through it, I really thought I'd be getting buried soon and life wasn't for me.
"I was suicidal & I had nothing left to give, I was sick of trying, sick of justifying myself, mentally absolutely DRAINED."
She went on to admit that she turned to alcohol to numb her pain and run away from her fears, including being scared of taking on motherhood as a single parent.
But now Stephanie says she's grateful for how her life turned out and admitting that she needed help was the first step on her road to recovery.
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"I said the three words I found so hard to say because of my pride... I need help," Stephanie continued. "Them three words what I feared as weakness turned out to be my strength. I couldn't do it alone.
"I have learnt how to be able to cope with hard times, I've learnt to like ME, I'm starting to learn who I really am.
"Now all I want to do is help others, to give hope! I'm not ashamed of being an addict in recovery I am proud. It saved my life & made me a better person!!
"Today I'm so thankful for my life & son. Today I'm grateful I'm alive."
Earlier this week, during an Instagram Q & A, Stephanie also opened up about her experiences with self-harm.
The actress also admitted that her "rock bottom" was worse than anything the public saw.
"Trust me it was a lot worse than what the public has seen," she said. "I had so many rock bottoms, but my biggest one was actually in rehab when I put down alcohol and had nothing to stop the pain anymore.
"THAT was a killer when all the suppressed emotions came back. I don't know how I came through it all looking back. I've worked so freaking hard."
While there's no date yet for Stephanie's Hollyoaks return, last month fans were given their first look at the new Sinead O'Connor and even a hint that she'll be arriving back in the village with a new man in tow.
We would encourage anyone who identifies with the topics raised in this article to reach out. Organisations who can offer support include Samaritans on 116 123 (www.samaritans.org) or Mind on 0300 123 3393 (www.mind.org.uk). Readers in the US are encouraged to visit mentalhealth.gov or the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
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